One of the toughest things about being an introvert is finding good companionship. Whether it be friendly or romatic in nature. As an INFJ I find it hard to be around people for extended amount of time without feeling drained. The problem? You pretty much have to be around people to make new friends.
On top of that, unless for some reason I stimulate the interest of an extrovert, they usually don’t try to get to know me. I’m fairly quick to figure out who will put forth the effort to see past my layers. If I sense someone is fairly shallow with only personal interests in mind, I purposely sabotage the relation just to be able to get out of it. After all, why waste our precious time when we both know that I will be seen as a boring, quiet stump who does nothing but sit around and think about whatever presses my mind?
I guess when I look for a friend, I look for someone who is okay with comfortable silence. Hence the line “let’s be alone together” made famous by Fall Out Boy. Comfortable silence is a reassurance that neither of us has to pretend and fake social graces just to seem normal. We can sit together and enjoy each other’s company while figuring out the complex puzzles in our heads.
Even though I am an introvert, I still love people and I don’t necessarily love being alone. But on the flip side of that complex coin, I sometimes ( actually quite often) need to process what I’ve internalized all day. That’s how I cope. I take everything in and at the end of the day I like to sort it out in to understandable patterns and paths that make sense to me.
I guess I would just love to meet someone who would be okay with my silence. I would be in company yet alone.
What an interesting concept…
Loads of Love,