Quiet Confidence


I have been mulling this thought over for quite a while now. (A few weeks, to be more precise.) I have been told my whole life that my quietness is attributed to a lack of confidence. Apparently I am too weak and meek to know who I am and what I want.

To those who have been assuming this, you are horribly mistaken.

(And before I begin, this is not a rant post, merely an explanation if you will.)

I know exactly who I am, all of my strengths and weaknesses and what I want out of life. This may be a shock to most people, but just because someone does not speak does not mean that they cannot speak. I tend to be a thinker more than a speaker.

According to the MBTI scale, I am an INFJ. (This means I am probably one of the rarest type people you will ever meet considering the INFJ community makes up only 1-3% of the world’s population.) When I am quite, I am thinking about how I can fix something or pondering on one of life’s many mysteries. No, it’s not because I am insecure or trying to find who I am. I tend to feel and see things on a whole different level. I like to think about what is going on around me and internalize it. After I internalize, I take what I have learned or have discovered and create it into something.

I love to listen to others and get to know them better. Nothing makes me happier than sitting down with someone and simply talking about who they are. I get to take all the pieces they have given me and put it into a beautiful and unique puzzle. You see, I consider listening a beautiful thing. People just don’t listen anymore. They merely scream out their opinions in their ‘confident’ voice and assume someone will listen.

*Tip of the day: If you want someone to listen to you, try truly listening to them first. I know, it seems hard but all you have to do is close your mouth and open your brain. Easy peasy.

I don’t have a loud voice, an overdramatic entrance or a strong smothering opinion, but I love myself just the way I am. I refuse to try and change myself to be loud and extroverted just for the sake of ‘confidence.’ To be frank, some of the most insecure (and annoying) people I have ever met are loud and so called ‘confident.’

The true definition of confidence is loving and accepting who you are. If you are a quiet wall flower, love yourself! If you are extroverted, accept it! Don’t let people change and mold you into what they want you to be. Be confident and love who you are. Why change when you are so amazing?

Loads of Love,


4 thoughts on “Quiet Confidence

  1. Wow this is so me ! I also am in that small percent and it took me until I was in my thirties to accept the fact than I am a listener. A thinker. An observer. I am not loud. Or animated. And I love it!! Because I am the organic me and I agree with you about being who you are. Accept and embrace YOU because know one can do it better;-)

    Have you read the book Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking by Susan Cain? I haven’t yet but it’s next on my reading list.

    I’m so glad you realized all this time its been the mistake of others and you are who you are intended to be;-)

    Thanks for sharing!

  2. Oh my gosh, this is so ironic. I took a test the other day and found out that I am also INFJ. Wow, only a small percentage and I found someone else who is like me. This is kind of cool! 🙂

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